Finding Secular Humanism a tad too ego-centric, I had a look at SpiritualHumanism.org. There, you can “become an ordained member of the Spiritual Humanist clergy for FREE”. Strange that this is the very first thing on the page that you see – I guess this is the hook! Alas and alack, there are some significant powers a Spiritual Humanist clergymember simply does not enjoy, as mentioned in the FAQ on the site:
You are prohibited from performing ceremonies that involve exorcism, circumcision and animal sacrifice.
What, all at once?!? Damn!!! What a party that would be!