I felt I had to preserve these work-related haiku. They are mostly inside jokes regarding a fellow employee who was not well-liked.
destruction of position
i wait for the axe
I want to kill Tim,
Roast his flesh in large flames, but
My dogs won’t eat him.
i’ve reached inner chi
by not fucking killing you
at least not today
i meditate on
opening can of whoop ass
making me happy
we listen and talk
our responses are ignored
better luck next time
The one who is Tim
Makes no lasting impression
save: “Are you there?””
why try what is hard
when surrounded by others
simply stay fuzzy
And on other subject, Jon recently came up with some haiku tributes to our glorious systems administrator (Josh):
I break the system
the users cry in horror
you are all fuckers
the system is down
life breathes into the server
the system is up
our admin is great
he delivers new function
we should all hug him
my user id
it would be very useful
too many haiku
Joke of the day:
What do Atheists scream during sex?
'Ohhh, chemical chance, chemical chance'
-- Bill Hicks
Only nerds will appreciate this —
Yesterday I was in Farifax at General Dynamics undergoing training for networking middleware being used for Navy applications for submarines and the like. The instructor was a C programmer who’d been around the block coming up with slick multiplatform networking tools for messaging and suchlike. He mentioned taking a few Java courses and liking the language. We mentioned benefits, such as the lack of pointer confusion in Java, which led to a discussion of some interesting bugs. One is a Hashtable bug in Java itself that I think has already been fixed. The bug is that Java pretty much dies if you put a Hashtable in itself.
This led to an anecdote by a newly employed GD guy who looked fresh out of college. He told us about a bug in the old Zork text adventure; in certain parts of the game, you have containers that you can put things in. But if you put containers within containers, sometimes weird stuff happens. Here’s a quote from another site:
“Another container bug, but this one is in all versions, even the
Solid Gold edition (EXCEPT for Version 2, with its notoriously small
containers again). If you put the (inflated) raft in the coffin, then the
coffin in the raft, both will disappear. This does not work the other way
around, however. If you put the coffin in the raft first, then the raft in
the coffin, you get a message saying that there is no room. In Mini-Zork,
this bug not only appears, but the game locks up to boot (no pun
intended). — Graeme Cree”
Like I said, it is only amusing if you spend a lot of time programming for a living.
Here is yet another fun assortment of random words from a spam message, done by the spammers in the attempt to avoid being filtered by the ever-improving junk email filters:
soot,devils got him!’,nash,heads gone! crunch,capacious,the stranger smiled.knightsbridge,see the group,blaine,a shame! what.
Nobody has the answers; but yet everyone has rules.
Another good quote:
“A mind all logic is like a knife all blade. It makes the hand bleed
that uses it.”
– Rabindranath Tagore
Funny quote of the day:
“You know, back in 2000 a Republican friend warned me that if I voted
for Al Gore and he won, the stock market would tank, we’d lose
millions of jobs and our military would be totally overstretched.
You know what: I did vote for Al Gore, he did win, and I’ll be damned
if all those things didn’t come true.”
– James Carville, U.S. political consultant and pundit, in his new
book Had Enough? A Handbook for Fighting Back.
Testing the mozilla LiveJournal extension (Deepest Sender)