The self-cleaning ecosystem

Our after-dinner treat tonight was discovering that Iris had left a massive turd on the dining room floor. Our response:

  • Step 1: Take Iris to the bathroom to get her cleaned up.
  • Step 2: Go back to the dining room to take the turd off the.. hey, the turd’s gone, and the dog’s got a big smile on his face.
  • Step 3: Listen to Iris scolding the dog repeatedly with “Don’t eat my poopie, Gonzo! Not nice!”
  • Step 4: Regard the incident as extremely disgusting, and replace this regard with “Oh, wait, at least he helped solve the problem.”


“It had a delightful, full-bodied aroma of toddler chow. Now I will pant in your vicinity.”

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