Our after-dinner treat tonight was discovering that Iris had left a massive turd on the dining room floor. Our response:
- Step 1: Take Iris to the bathroom to get her cleaned up.
- Step 2: Go back to the dining room to take the turd off the.. hey, the turd’s gone, and the dog’s got a big smile on his face.
- Step 3: Listen to Iris scolding the dog repeatedly with “Don’t eat my poopie, Gonzo! Not nice!”
- Step 4: Regard the incident as extremely disgusting, and replace this regard with “Oh, wait, at least he helped solve the problem.”
“It had a delightful, full-bodied aroma of toddler chow. Now I will pant in your vicinity.”