{"id":203,"date":"2006-03-10T11:52:47","date_gmt":"2006-03-10T16:52:47","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/oranchak.com\/?p=203"},"modified":"2006-03-10T11:52:47","modified_gmt":"2006-03-10T16:52:47","slug":"what-not-to-put-on-your-resume","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.oranchak.com\/?p=203","title":{"rendered":"What not to put on your resume"},"content":{"rendered":"

Funny resume\/interview stories that Josh<\/a> found on TotalFark<\/a> a while back:<\/p>\n

This guy’s a team player:<\/p>\n

\nI was going to post snippits from resumes I’ve recieved, but I decided against it. The best I’ve ever gotten:
\n\tBurger King
\n\t* Ringing register
\n\t* Flipping burgers
\n\t* Doing what my manager told me to do<\/b>
\nAnd I’m not even kidding.\n<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Too honest:<\/p>\n

On a side note, I saw a resume the other day for a guy who minored in “Alcohol and Substance Abuse”. Didn’t we all…<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Some people, like Josh, can get away with cursing during the interview. But not this guy:<\/p>\n

\nWe were interviewing college kids for paid internships at my old job (computers\/engineering). One guy kept using the F-word DURING THE INTERVIEW. Maybe he used it during everyday conversation, don’t really care, but he couldn’t seem to stop for even the 30 minutes we talked to him.\n<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Unintended wording:<\/p>\n

\nWe got one here for a secretary position where the applicant proudly proclaimed that she “exceeded every deadline given”\n<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

She can sling it, literally AND figuratively:<\/p>\n

We got one from a woman who had been out of the workforce for five years while raising her kid. These words should never, ever be placed in a resume: “If I can clean poop, I can work for you!” We interviewed her anyway, and she wasn’t very bright.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Career-limiting emanations:<\/p>\n

Once, while interviewing a candidate an unpleasant smell crept into my office. She asked me, “Is that my feet?” It was. Funny thing is that she looked great on paper.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Funny resume\/interview stories that Josh found on TotalFark a while back: This guy’s a team player: I was going to post snippits from resumes I’ve recieved, but I decided against it. The best I’ve ever gotten: Burger King * Ringing … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[11],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-203","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-funny"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.oranchak.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/203","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.oranchak.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.oranchak.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.oranchak.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.oranchak.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=203"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/www.oranchak.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/203\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.oranchak.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=203"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.oranchak.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=203"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.oranchak.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=203"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}